an ode

To All the Justin Biebers We’ve Loved This Summer

Photo: BackGrid, Getty

Justin Bieber had a big summer. He got engaged to his female doppelgänger, Hailey Baldwin; he released a few new songs, he got a little closer to God; and he fully embraced his inner mustachioed dirtbag. (It’s true, )

Lucky for us in New York, Bieber blossomed right here in our backyard, which is why his summer style felt so … familiar. Perhaps we recognized ourselves in his baggy gym shorts, Hawaiian shirts, and Adidas slide sandals. He is, after all, the physical embodiment of vacation, or the “fearless” DGAF 20-something we all wish we could be, as his stylist, Karla Welch described it. But he also looked a lot like all the boys we’ve loved before. That is our truth.

Below, all the guys Justin Bieber reminded us of this summer.

• A young Matthew McConaughey.
• The guy who betrayed Drake in the music video for “.”
• The guy who paid his rent in cryptocurrency and is now crashing on your couch “until the bubble pops.”
• The skateboarder you met in Soho who texts you on Tuesdays at 2 a.m.
• The Australian on Bumble looking for someone to go on “adventures” with.
• A guy who just sold his first gram of weed and now his Instagram handle is “@EscobarMon3y.”
• A south Florida man who says he is a club promoter, but then you find out it’s only for strip clubs after you and your friends agreed to meet him.
• Several different uncles rolled into one person.
• Someone who would start a fight at an Arby’s.
• A “creative.”
• Your high-school boyfriend who now works at an improv theater and says that Shia LaBeouf went there once.
• The guy on Tinder who’s in your radius one minute and then 389 miles away the next.
• The guy who quit his job in finance to work at Vice.
• The teen manning the mini-golf course at the Jersey Shore this summer.
• The guy who doesn’t know who Blake Lively is.
• A GQ editor.
• What you imagine when you hear the voices of Chapo Trap House.
• The guy who works at Roberta’s and says that being full is a “construct.”
• Honestly, a pretty cool guy.